Spouts

Response To John The Steadfast

2010-07-14T07:46:00.000-07:00

I've been following along with my Lutheran Synod's decisions the past week down here in Houston, and have been here to talk with some of the pastor's as well! It's been great to see, but I have been seeing a lot of saddening blog posts and degrading comments to fellow brother's and sister's in Christ's worship habits and styles- so I posted a response on these blogs here:

http://steadfastlutherans.org/?p=11492

http://steadfastlutherans.org/?p=11487

Here is my response to them on this blog:

I wonder why people assume that standing up, swaying, and lifting hands to the LORD has anything to do with calling attention to themselves? When I read the scriptures I see all kinds of physical expressions to praise the LORD with at our disposal- not just the sitting and standing up we tend to use in our congregations. It shouldn’t matter to us whether or not people stand to worship the LORD or if they fall on the ground to adore Him.

I would question all of our hearts dear brothers and sisters if all we can say after our Synod meets to worship the LORD together as one church for the first time in 3 years are things that are neither prescribed or mandated in scripture. What a cross looks like should make no difference to me how I worship the LORD. Who wrote a song should not matter either. All of you should agree that God is in the business of using messed up sinful people and things to glorify His name and show His love.

I see more argument in the scriptures for people to express themselves in worship through physical actions than to stand there only having emotions going on inside themselves but never expressing it. God created us all with feelings that we express daily (some of you on the blog express yourself through written word) why should God’s people divorce themselves from those feelings within worship?

I would argue that there is a greater scriptural basis for the fact that there SHOULD be more hand raising and swaying in church. As well as prostrating, kneeling, clapping, dancing, you name it, being used to praise the LORD- regardless if it is lead by organ, piano, guitar, choir, or drummers from Africa!

I am appalled and saddened by the way the leaders of our church today express their opinions and preferences about worship with little/no regard for those who do not feel the same way as them. It makes me sad to see such disrespectful comments here on this blog which mock and criticize fellow brothers and sisters worshipping habits, styles, and preferences.

I enjoy all forms of worship and appreciate them all for what they bring to my soul and spirit. I love Matins, all Divine Services, and even Contemporary worship- not because I get to worship the LORD how I want to- but because the LORD is worthy to be praised at all times and in all places. He is worthy of our worship not because we feel comfortable doing it one way, or think that one way is most accurately what God wants- but because simply He is the LORD and worthy to be praised.

There are arguments on both sides as to which way is the ‘right’ way to worship the LORD- but I think if we put all of our differences aside we would all see that there is not just ‘ONE WAY.’ The LORD meets us all in different ways. We have freedom in Christ. There are sinners on both sides trying to worship the LORD and create ways in which our congregations can worship Him as well. The problem is when we as prideful men get in the way of the freedoms in which Christ gives us.
To say that there are lower forms of worship is very insulting and degrading to a lot of people in our Synod- and it shows a problem of pride in our hearts. I would urge all of us to be reminded of 1 Corinthians 8:1 when Paul was talking to the Corinthians about a preference as well:

Now about food sacrificed to idols: We know that we all possess knowledge. Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up.

There is no building up of our brothers in our replies and posts, but there is plenty of pride being tossed around through degrading opinions and all of our earthly/sinful knowledge.

President Kieschnick was correct to preach to us about forgiveness in our opening service because we need it now these days more than ever. Knowledge should never be used to ‘Lord over’ people but rather to build each other up in love. You can not claim to love your fellow brothers if you continue to degrade them and treat them like they are ‘lesser’ just because they have differing opinions.

I would encourage all of us who haven’t yet to read Dr. Mike Middendorf’s CTCR document on ‘Freedom In Christ…Even In Worship?’ And to begin to take physical action toward restoring the unity of our Synod through love- first dying to ourselves, then taking up the cross and speaking to each other with respect and love.

We cannot hide behind our prideful and degrading comments through the excuse that we are sinful beings. This is not a good enough excuse. It is simple laziness and a half-hearted dedication to our brothers. Christ calls us to a greater unity then that and through His Spirit we can rise above all of the pettiness on both sides to achieve unity.

I would like to see this blog site take the first steps toward that. And our pastors as the leaders of our Synod to be the first people to stand and live that way through our actions and words.

May Christ be with us all.

Peaches!

In The Marmalade Forest...

2010-03-17T18:59:00.000-07:00

Dan, Meghan, and I hopped on to a different tour for the second part of our tour yesterday to visit the Muir Woods instead of the city!

Day Two- Muir Woods

Peaches

Are You Going To San Francisco?!

2010-03-17T09:31:00.001-07:00

Check it out! We met up with our good friend Meghan and did a tour of Alcatraz!

Day Two- Alcatraz

Peaches

Out On The Open Road!

2010-03-16T00:43:00.000-07:00

We took the 101 up to San Fran! Here is just a brief taste of what our travels were like today in the car and at the restaurants we ate!

Day One- Road Trip!!!

Stay tuned for some great tourist videos tomorrow!

Peaches

Leaving The O.C. (Don't Call It That...)

2010-03-15T11:26:00.000-07:00

For these blogs I'd like to have you venture over to the further links to watch the videos my roommate Dan and I will be making to show everyone what it's like to travel through the continent. Or something like that...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xkj9IsjoaU0

Peaches!

'Cuz I Wear My Own Kind Of Hat.

2009-09-17T03:14:00.000-07:00

The life of a college graduate who wishes to impact the world, but is stuck deep in financial debt, absolutely sucks balls. ha ha ha ha...I wonder if there can be more to life than what everyone makes it out to be. I have to believe that life is more than getting a 401K and an annual salary. I believe life is more about the relationships you grow in, and less about what you do in life.

But at the same time, my whole focus these past couple weeks have been trying to find a job that pays money so that I can pay my bills. You see, when you travel to Africa for two months and you don't work- your income goes down and your bank account goes to a big fat 0. :)

This week I have been soul searching for what kinds of things in life I am willing to barter my soul for in order to pay bills. So far I have thrown out prostitution, and killing. I cleaned windows for this company out in L.A. this weekend and made $100! I have also been trying to get involved with this homeless shelter in Costa Mesa. I figure perhaps I can help people AND pay bills! :) On a morning walk this morning, doing my quiet time and applying for jobs nearby, I might have acquired a job teaching worship band lessons at Orchepia School Of Music! I just walked in and asked if they would hire me, and wouldn't leave until I got a job. :) ha ha ha...actually, God just really opened a door for it, and I walked in.

This past weekend marked the final goodbye to one of my best friends Michael Knippa. He is off to Cambridge for a whole year of school, and I will miss him a lot. I hope to see him on Skype a lot. I had a friend from Oklahoma/South Africa come and visit me this week as well. He will be missed terribly by me once he goes away. But I know that more music videos will be coming between him and I for quite some time. :)

My band- The Orange Effect- plays their first show this weekend. It should be a huge turnout, and I believe we are going to rock it out big time. We have been practicing for this night for a very long time and I can't wait to hear the live product!!!! We play in Huntington Beach, so people let me know if you'll be in the area!

It's weird being in Irvine after graduation. All of your friends go to college still, and other people give you this look like why are you here on campus- don't you have your own life? But, the thing is, those people are a huge part of my life. And I don't care where they were located, I would do what I could to be around them and be a part of their life. I guess I'm saying that if peeing my pants was cool, you could consider me Miles Davis. I like those people, and I want to be involved in their life. To love them. To have them love me. etc, etc, etc...

I'm searching for a church job. But contemplating if the church is really where God wants me to invest my time and energy into. Perhaps He has a bigger canvas that He wants me to paint on. I wrote a new song about it, and I'm in love with it. It came out of my body in like ten minutes, and I believe it was sent from heaven as a glimpse of something that the angels sing to God continuously. I have a solo gig this Sunday night in Anaheim. I think it will be a lot of fun and I'm excited to see how I do. :)

Life is exciting. Growth is difficult. Love is hard.

Peaches.

Turn Out The Lights, The Parties Over...

2009-09-17T02:50:00.000-07:00

It's August 14th in the early am, and I have finally decided that I should attempt to process my trip this summer to East Africa. I guess I've put it off long enough, since life seems to be running around at completely normal lightning fast speed. It's funny, because before I left, this speed was really easy and normal for me. Now it seems like a massive billboard size train just comes down and hits you up against the side of your face as you fly in the air and try to find something to hold on to...I bet none of that makes sense to anyone but myself. :)

I guess I think that the longer I take to actually write and publish this, the longer it will be until I have to finally face the fact that I'm no longer in Kansas anymore. In fact, I'm residing in what looks like the opposite of Kansas- Orange County. lol...

I've visited with friends, family, enemies, and strangers. I've bought a new belt, ate foods I did not have over there, made meals I missed from Africa, and stayed up late at night wishing I could go back to that place where everyday seemed like a little slice of the Kingdom of God. I've tried my best to adjust back to the culture here in the states, but it really seems like it might be something I may never adjust back to. Perhaps I will stay this person that people think acts funny forever. ha ha ha...

Of course everyone wants to know how my trip to Africa was, and I gladly wish to tell it because of the huge impact it has had on my small existence here on this earth- but I grow weary of the people who want to hear the one word answers, or wish to hear a five minute version of something that lasted over 2 months. ha ha ha...it just cannot be told that fast! Nor does it speak to me of caring about me and the growth in which I have experienced.

I was expecting coming home and being flabbergasted by an excess use of resources, having our wants too disproportionate to our actual needs, and for our selfishness as a culture to win almost every time over the strive for community and unselfishness. But I wasn't ready for the huge gaping hole I got after I woke up the second day home expecting to see my teammates from the trip that morning- only to be surprised by the fact that they weren't. I hadn't realized how close we'd become over the past months.

How much we had lived together.

It's crazy because it happens so slowly. One day you start your trip and you're praying that you won't have to kill the person sitting next to you due to stress and your need for quiet- the next you feel like you've lost a part of your family.

Which leads me to what I think is the biggest thing I have 'learnt done real good' over in the countries of East Africa:

Community.

Too often since coming home have I seen the people around me choose solidarity and independence over community and vulnerability. Some people don't see how lonely they are, or how their independence kills their growth. Most people choose the things they need first, over talking and developing relationships. Striving after the wind, chasing meaninglessness.

I long for the days where it seemed as if we were finally living life the way it was meant to be. I pray that all of you reading this would be able to experience such community and passion. It's sad that it seems as though God gave us all this huge taste of heaven, only to rip it out from under us- but I think it has more to do with wanting us to strive for it now and recognize it exists and is possible. The ability to desire it and be passionate about it is more than enough to start a spark.

I've been traveling a lot this past month, and I've been piecing this together week by week, thought by thought. I miss Africa deep in my soul. But it is not my full calling. My mission field is here for now. It is about Jesus reaching Christians who have lost their way. Christians who think they have it all figured out, but don't. Who hide behind false smiles which mask deep pain and sorrow. Who think that by coming to church on Sunday they've paid their dues. Jesus doesn't want our money. He doesn't want our false worship. He wants us to live out our faith. He wants us to live together. To unite for one purpose- saving souls and living life. He wants us to grow together. Challenge one another. Mourn with each other. Grow in love.

I'm going to move this Africa blog to a different place that way I can keep my other blog. Until then, I will keep them up here so that those of you who wish to continue reading these can do so, and may it be a resource in which it helps develop you spiritually, emotionally, and physically as much as this trip has me.

Peaches.

A Brief Short.

2009-07-23T10:30:00.000-07:00

It's been a while- and that's because I've been living on a freaking deserted Island all week with a family from Kibuye and teaching them English! :) It was awesome!

I will write again very very soon, but I just got back and wanted everyone to stop worrying. :)

Last friday I twisted my ankle playing basketball and it swelled up to the size of a baseball...I went to the hospital (just for you mom) and they gave me a freaking walker to use all week. I quickly did away with that after the second day. Now I'm on day 6 and running around, not literally, but at least walking. :)

Doctor said two weeks...take that doctor...I'll take a deserted island and my God over any doctor any day of the week. :)

Peaches

We'll Go Fishing In The Hole...

2009-07-14T06:08:00.000-07:00

So, it's been a ridiculously long time since my last post, and so many things have happened! Finding internet in Rwanda has been a very difficult task, but I think I have a handle on it now.

When we arrived in Kigali we went to the Genocide Museum to learn a little bit about the tragic events that happened here in the 90's. It was devastating to hear about all the horrible things that happened. Neighbor killing neighbor. Children being smashed against walls to death. All because of a false racist segregation between 'hutu's' and 'tutsi's'- a term that was made by the white western men who came and segragated the people in the early 1900's- much like the Nazi's in Germany.

It was horrible to see the amount of injustice in this nation, and to hear and see interviews of President Clinton on how America would not respond because it was not in our own interest. A member from the U.N. actually said that all that was here were people- so there was no interest to intervene as thousands of victims were being slaughtered left and right.

It was heart breaking to think how little I've heard of this from school, or the media. And worse to think that the same thing is happening right now in the world- and how little we are hearing about the genocide happening now.

And I wonder what it takes for me to actually stand up for the value of humanity? How much is a human life worth to me? Can I feel this impassioned for people in the world without having to visit a museum and hear the horrible stories? Shouldn't me just hearing about injustice make me want to do something to help? Why don't I?

I think it's because I choose ignorance over knowledge. I'd rather not have to know about all the pain and suffering that happens in the world- that way I can sleep with myself at night. It's also honestly because I suck at valuing a human life above my own.

When we last left off on the adventures of Starsky and Hutch, I was out in Uganda rocking it at a boarding school named Destiny. Now we are out in Rwanda and we are busy doing a various amount of activities under the P.E.A.C.E. organization which is something that Saddleback Church in Orange County has started out here in Kibuye and Kigali to empower these cities to rise above the genocides that happened exactly 15 years ago this summer.

This plan is to empower the communities through teaching English, improving medical facilities, and visiting the community in their homes. Saddleback has set this operation up so that it is self sufficient and totally reliant on the people that live here in these cities. They are the ones operating everything. Visitor's, like my team, are used by the people to help them in whatever way they wish to use us. We have been training to teach English to these people for the last 7 months before our trip out here. I am happy to see that our training has paid off and we are all very excited to be out here! Not only do we get this great opportunity, but this will be the first time we will be involved in a ministry out here for an extended amount of time. I am excited to finally be able to establish relationships and learn how to love them in a greater way.

On Sunday I went to an Assemblies of God church and they asked me to sing for them. I played them a praise song I wrote a while back, and they compared me to Michael Jackson. ha ha...then they told me I had to stay out here and teach them music so that they could learn how to praise God also in English and through American pop music. I haven't ruled it out yet. The city here is amazing, and beyond beautiful.

We went swimming in lake Kivu later that day against the warnings of parasites and eels running wild. The weather was perfect and it couldn't go to waste! :) It was a wonderful day all in all. No parasites yet, mom. :)

Yesterday was my first day teaching- I am team teaching a group of 13 pastors in the area. They want to learn English so that they can still be relevant to the culture and so that they can teach their congregations English. They desire to come to America and to preach the gospel to us. It was heart breaking to hear their questions as to why the Christians in America allow so many ungodly and unbiblical things to happen in our country. They wish to teach us the scriptures so that we can be led back to the path of the righteous. It has been a humbling experience.

One of the pastor's in my class is having a baby today! I am so excited for him! He ran out of my class to the hospital, and I am going to visit him later today!

Yesterday Andrew and I went and played basketball with some local men nearby on the city courts. It was 5 on 5 in a game of 21. I had a great time playing in my sandals and slacks! Ha ha...but they asked us to be on their professional team for the weekend as they are having a big tournament- they offered to pay us each 20 dollars and want us to come to practice this whole week, I am for sure in. :)

I had my first bit of culture shock this past weekend meeting with a team from Saddleback who were only out here for two weeks and were giving us advice about the town. So many things have become unimportant now. I literally wanted to bash my head into a wall listening to them talk about germs and cleanliness and showering with cold water and driving everywhere....it was so ridiculous. I am not ready to go back to the states. I have noticed in my life through these minimal 9 weeks so many things that I believe are essential for living, but really have no importance at all. In fact, almost nothing matters. God matters. Relationships matter. Love matters. But safety doesn't. Being comfortable doesn't.

Needless to say, the culture shock is gonna be big...

Tonight I'm going fishing with a man I met last night while helping out at the local 'English Corner' (a place designed for people to come and practice English with others there). He is a fisherman for a living and we are going night fishing. Not everything was translated well between us, but there is something involving light and either a net, or they just jump into the boat once you shine the light on the water. I am not sure which of these will be the case- but I have been wanting to do this all freaking trip and I cannot wait! :)

I hope this finds all of you guys well! Sorry I can't write enough, I wish I could write for another hour or so!

Peaches.

A Quarter Of His Life Is Gone, And What's He Doin Here?

2009-07-04T16:25:00.000-07:00

So today I turned 25 a little over 8 hours earlier than the years past due to the time change here in Uganda. It’s weird thinking about how old 25 feels. Every other birthday has come and gone, and few of them have ever felt different than the year before- but this year feels much different. I feel really old. Ha ha ha…I’m not sure why, I just do. I’ve been thinking more and more this year how different my life has turned out since I dreamt about it as a small child. I never thought I’d still be unmarried at this age and without children. I didn’t think I would have just graduated from college. I didn’t expect anything that God has given me so far in my life. When I think about it- God really hasn’t given me anything I thought would be best for me in life- He has given me so much more. It’s true He hasn’t given me a wife or kids so far (and still might never give them!) but He has blessed me with a wonderful family that has always believed in me and my dreams. He has led my life in a different direction than I originally intended with education (6 years for a Bachelor’s degree isn’t the highlight of any life…)— but he has blessed me with so many absolutely amazing opportunities and experiences that I would not have otherwise had.

So though I may tend to lean to a depressing thought about how life isn’t where it was supposed to be- I should remember that God has brought me to this place. God has directed my path- and I am exactly where He wants me. I am doing exactly what He wants me to do. I know this because I believe in a God who has authored my very first breath, and He has continued to give me that breath of life up till now! (minus those 30 seconds in the Nile…ha ha)

I am blessed beyond my age, and I know I will continue to be blessed from here on out! I have no idea what the future holds- but I know that while God is in control (and He is…) I have nothing to fear, or regret, or feel like I’ve missed out on something in life- because I am being prepared daily for the works that God has prepared in advance for me to do! And so do all of you folks out there reading this!!!!! Yee Haw! J

Okay, that is enough nostalgia for the moment. We went up to Gulu, Uganda a couple days back to go check out the Invisible Children organization. A lot of us on the trip and thousands of young adults in the states help support this group to educate children and free the city Gulu from the horrible devastation caused by Joseph Coney. If you haven’t heard about this group, you can check them out at: InvisibleChildren.com You may have heard of them recently from their brief interview with Oprah about 2 months ago on her show.

We spent one of the nights out there in an IDP camp, which for those of you who don’t know what that means- Internally Displaced People. These people were forced to live in these camps for their safety and such. We spent the night with a wonderful host called Mama, lol. She was so amazing. It was great to be with her and her family in the camp. I watched the most beautiful sunset there, and shared a wonderful night under the stars telling children’s stories and playing the guitar. While I was out there I wrote this excerpt from my journal (I apologize for the length, but it’s my birthday, so deal with it!!!!) ha ha…anyway, here goes-

================

Solace is something that every man longs to find- yet I am unsure as to whether or not it was ever promised to us. I have found my heart the quietest in times that seem the least likely. And also the most dangerous. Walking through the slums of Mathare and sleeping there, now sitting on this bench in Gulu at an IDP camp. Here is where I have found some of my most peaceful moments- and it is here where I have found a small piece of this thing called solace, or perhaps peace.
I think God created beauty to be mixed with danger- for the thrill of it is what makes it beautiful in some ways. Amongst intense suggering and pain, filth and sadness- comes beauty- comes joy- comes hope- comes peace.
I wonder if this is how You see our lives God. A beautiful world full of wonder and awe- something so amazing that it could only be created out of such intense love- yet it is tarnished at the same time with such filth and disgust- it is so disgusting it smells at times. It reeks and makes You want to cry because of the way we live in comparison to what You know is best- it makes You angry at times I bet. Yet it is Your compassion on us and Your love for us that will make You continue to encourage us to grow. It is because you see our potential that You discipline us daily- it is because of Your love for us that You never stop challenging and strengthening us.

Right?

Is it anything like that?

Can you stare at the earth- full of pollution and crooks, liars, beggars, gossipers, money hoarders, unfair treatment of human lives, killing of innocent children- all these things- and still find the beauty that You created it all to be?

I think You can. I think You have. I think You already see what it will be when we are reunited in Jerusalem- and that is why You love us. Why we are still here. Why You have sacrificed everything for what we are becoming.

For this- I am in awe of You.

I stand in wonder over Your ability to love.

God- I want to know my next move for You and Your Kingdom. I want to know where You want me- and I am ready to follow You wherever You wish to send me. I say this with huge fears about what this means for the future- but I promise that if You’re patient I will follow. I want to be Your disciple. I want to follow You. I wish that You will begin to show me Your plan for my next stop. Perhaps I am not ready yet- make that apparent to me. Maybe You’ve been waiting for me to say this for ten years or more- well then today is one of the happiest days of my life. Thank You God for bringing me this far to You with Your. Holy Spirit, and Jesus Christ. As my first 24/25 years come to a close I am thankful for the grace, mercy, and discipline/love You have given me. I want it more and more.

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This week we have been in Kampala, Uganda and I have had an absolute blast out here! So far we have spent our time at an orphanage/boarding school called Destiny. It’s a wonderful school that lies up on top of this jungle hill and is the best education that Kampala schools can offer two times in a row.

Today for my birthday we went to the local US Embassy to celebrate the 4th with all of our local Americans here in Uganda! A good ole fashioned BBQ with a wonderful fireworks show and a dance party. My friends on the team went up to the announcer and had her bring me to the front as the entire embassy sang happy birthday to me. Then we went to a local Irish Pub called Bubbles and danced the night away to a variety of random American songs. It was a splendid day for sure! J

This is about all I have for the time being. It is no longer my birthday in Uganda, and I have to wake up pretty early for church tomorrow! I hope this finds all of you well!

The Cost of Being a Disciple

Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple. "Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it? For if he lays the foundation and is not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule him, saying, 'This fellow began to build and was not able to finish.'
"Or suppose a king is about to go to war against another king. Will he not first sit down and consider whether he is able with ten thousand men to oppose the one coming against him with twenty thousand? If he is not able, he will send a delegation while the other is still a long way off and will ask for terms of peace. In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple.
"Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is fit neither for the soil nor for the manure pile; it is thrown out. "He who has ears to hear, let him hear."

Peaches.

The Way You Make Me Feel...

2009-06-26T04:26:00.000-07:00

First off, this blog will mostly be dedicated to the terrible and horrible news I found out this morning about the death of Michael Jackson today. Some may think that's funny, but I seriously loved that guy though I did not obviously know him personally. I felt sorry for the way the press portrayed him in the news, and I believe he has been given an unfair advantage and rap since he was found to be NOT guilty of molestation charges. I find it ignorant that the things people will remember him for mostly is the allegations of such charges. He was a man who sacrificed a lot of his life to help children throughout the world eat, have houses, and have a childhood- something he was never given since his pop career was thrusted on him at the age of 5. He really did have the rare disease that makes Black ethnicities lose pigments and turn white. In the 90's he produced and recorded an album of his and gave every single penny of it away to help starving children around the world. In 1985 he raised over 50 million dollars for the African relief fund with the song collaboration 'We Are The World.'

All of this to say- I will miss him a lot for some reason. He was going on tour in July, and he was making a new album for the fall. I was excited. And eager to see what he would do next....and I wish that I could go to his funeral in the states (I'm assuming...). Here are some articles I was reading today to get the full story...

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/06/26/michael.jackson/index.html

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/06/25/michael.jackson.world/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

It's weird hearing about certain things like this in Uganda, it reminds you of how far away from home you are. That's all I was thinking about this morning...weird I know.

Anyway, it's been a long time since I last posted, and as some of you might be able to tell from my facebook statusi's I have been quite busy out here in Uganda!!! So, here goes:

On Tuesday a group of us went and rafted UP the Nile on a stretch which involved class 5 rapids and it was absolutely amazing. I was very scared in the beginning to go, but eventually decided it was now or never- so I chose now. :) It was absolutely breath taking. Literally. The scariest part was a certain class 5 rapid which was named the Silverback. It is the most dangerous one out there for the day trip, and you know my boat flipped over in it! We all went under water, and I believe I counted to around 30-40 seconds before I could actually breath again. It was not a joke...I got caught inbetween two of the major currents in the middle part, and couldn't get myself to stop twisting and flipping in them! I went limp as soon as I hit the water and forced my butt up with my legs- but to no avail. I kept thinking- 'the air is coming soon...the air is coming soon...the air...is coming soon...the air IS coming soon...' Eventually I decided I would stick my hand up in hopes that one of the guides would see me and rescue my hand- but I could not even reach past the water...it was at this point that I accepted death to come my way and began to pass out- and then I surfaced and gasped for air!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh air is so nice. :)

The trip UP the Nile was very beautiful too though. There were many different places where we were allowed to jump out of the raft and just flow with the current and swim in the same river that gave both life and death to many communities throughout the ages. Including the same river that carried Moses to safety. It was in this very river I took my pants off and swam. :) ha ha ha...oh how amazing. :)

We spent our work at the Amani Baby Cottage on Wednesday and it was an amazing thrill to play with all the newborn babies (that was the group I volunteered for) in the morning, and then the little toddlers in the afternoon. It has been a humbling experience to witness first hand the dependency of a child and compare it to the same of that of God and ourselves. Even toddlers. Think of all the things they think they are in control of- yet in reality they have very little. Think of how they know everything that is good for them- yet they are very unsmart (yes, I know this isn't a word...). Now picture that analogy about 20 million times greater between us and God. We cannot even control our very next breath. Yet we feel entitled to so much as if it is 'ours.' Nothing we have is ours. And those who have been given much- much is expected to be given away, not kept to ourselves. This includes both physical and emotional things. Love, grace, peace, hope, joy, money, clothes, food, our time, our patience, etc....just something I was thinking about. I also cannot wait to be a father. I'm mildly thinking about adopting sometime within the next 5 years perhaps whether or not I'm married yet. I think it would be awesome to help rescue a child that needs love....

Today we are painting the kitchen and front fence of the place- their paint smells like gasoline. ha ha ha :) Later this week I might try the most difficult and scary thing I've ever thought about minus jumping out of a plane- bungie jumping over the Nile. But I'm undecided yet....who knows. :)

Anyway, I must get back to the orphanage and finish this paint job!!!!!

Peaches.

You Don't Need No Make Up OOOOOOOOOnnnnnnn....No Make-Up....No, No Make-Up....

2009-06-21T08:45:00.000-07:00

So I'm alive! :)

The slums are like twice as less scary as everyone says they are. It's actually really sad how unscary it is...I felt safe the whole time and I even went out and explored at night with my good friend Chris! It was great! We stayed with a man named Henry and his son Humphrey. He comes from the land that Obama comes from- Kenya is in love with Obama. They see him as the pinnacle of hope for them and their land. If a Kenyan can become President of the largest country in the world- then they too can do anything they set their minds too. I love it. :)

It's been funny this week because we have been driving in one of the most ghetto vans of all time while we have been staying in Kenya this week. It has strobe lights and a flat screen tv that plays old rap videos. It's been fun.

I am overwhelmed by the amount of poverty in Nairobi, and it is difficult to understand why people in America, myself included, waste so many of our resources on things that are very meaningless while others struggle to even feed and clothe themselves. I would challenge all of us to read a book entitled Irresistable Revolution as it has been impacting many of us on the trip thus far.

I taught in schools this week about HIV/AIDS. It was amazing for me to see the respect and honor I was received with while giving my speech about AIDS and such. Education here is seen as an opportunity. It is not a right, and it is something you earn here. Children and teachers alike listen with very high attentions and wish to learn as much as possible. They are also desperate for better teachers. They long for American teachers to come and help them teach the children. It's crazy.

While in the slums I ate what looked like spoiled fish, but it was one of the best meals I have had thus far! We made it by candlelight and then ate with our hands as is the tradition here in Kenya while eating a traditional food called Ugali. I payed for it the next day though. :)

Kilimanjaro was one of the most difficult physical things I have ever experienced. By day three I was on my knees puking my guts out most of the night due to either the stomach flu or altitude sickness. But I recovered for the next day which was good because that was our longest day. We hiked for 7 hours to around 4600 meters, slept for three hours, then woke up at 11pm to start hiking to the top for 7.5 hours. We climbed over 1300 meters in 7 hours. The incline was like walking up a wall. It was freezing cold. Like if you jumped into an ice lake then went into a freezer to warm up, then also brought in a fan. That's how cold it was. :)

But the sun rose, and I was amoung the small few that saw the sun come over the Tanzanian plains, and at that moment was one of the tallest people in all of the world. I am still wondering if I'd do it again- but once was worth it for sure. Kilimanjaro is one of the tallest mountains you can climb without having to bring oxygen tanks- though I would have like to have one. :)

Today we went to church and met back up with the church that we visited the week before last in Kenya. It was good to see the Conquerors again! :) Okay, the sun is going down in the ghetto...I have to leave the cafe! :)

Isaiah 55

The Compassion of the LORD

¹"Come, everyone who thirsts,
come to the waters;
and he who has no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without price.
² Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread,
and your labor for that which does not satisfy?
Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good,
and delight yourselves in rich food.
³Incline your ear, and come to me;
hear, that your soul may live;
and I will make with you an everlasting covenant,
my steadfast, sure love for David.

Peaches

Kilimanjaro, Nairobi, And Ghetto 89.5

2009-06-18T23:20:00.000-07:00

So it's been a long time since my last blog! I hope everyone didn't worry too much about whether or not I was dead yet! :) Internet is scarce out here still, and I had trouble finding enough time to actually sit down and write this out!

I made it to the top of the largest free standing mountain in 4 continents! Who said you need to train for this kind of stuff?! Next time I'm going to do Everest...maybe not. :) It was really amazing though to see the sunrise over the Tanzanian plains! So amazing. Ridiculously hard. Very very very hard. Don't let my making it make everyone think it was easy. lol...

I don't have tons of time to blog this morning, but I wanted to let you all know I was alive and that I freaking made it up there! All 5985 meters! Yeayuh!

This week we have been living in Nairobi working in the slums, teaching children about AIDS, and playing with orphans. Yesterday we built a hedge fence at a rehabilitation center for street boys. I met a guy named Godfrey who loves to play guitar, so I rocked with him for a bit, and taught him some basic jazz theory. He was eager to learn! It was cool because I haven't really thought of myself as a teacher before.

Prayers are needed tonight because I have decided to spend the night with a local family in the worst slum in the world tonight. Our God is more than able to protect me and all the others that have decided to come along with. I can't wait to share a meal and experience their hospitality. Not to scare you (including my mother :) ) but apparently the U.N. doesn't allow this, and there are plenty of what they call 'machete gangs' that go around and chop people's limbs off...but, this will only happen if God allows it. So, those of us going have chosen to show love tonight in the slums. I'll talk with you guys later! :)

Peaches

Norwegians Ain't So Bad...

2009-06-07T12:30:00.000-07:00

Nairobi has been good to us thus far. We have come into contact with a lot of people out here and have hopefully made some really good strides for the gospel and to further the mission of the church in Kenya.

The group on Friday went to a church in Kiambo to help them build their church. When we got there we immediately started hauling boulders from one side of the land to the layout of the floor so that they could be used for a solid foundation for the church once concrete was poured. We also trekked to the nearby river to fetch pails of water so that they could continue wetting down the concrete they had already poured. When we finished with this, they asked us to sing for them inside the new church that has no roof over it, and no floor poured. It was again humbling to stand where someday people in the slums will stand and praise our God.

After this we went into their current sanctuary- a poor excuse for even a rugged tool shed. It was the size of my father's shed, but made out of wood, and 20 years old. The floors are mud, and when it rains in Kenya (a common occurance I'm finding) they have to cancel church. You can see the need for a new sanctuary...

The pastor had been there from the beginning and was talking about his hopes for the future, and he charged us on the team with a challenge. He asked us to help them find enough money so that they can buy 20 pews for their new sanctuary. He told us that it would cost probably around 700 dollars and asked if that was possible as if he were expecting us to say no. I almost laughed in disgust and cried all at the same time when he told me this. It enrages me that we could be so frivilous with our spendings as a church in America, yet cannot help provide basic sitting needs for our brother's and sister's in Kenya. It upsets me that I live that way as well. It disgusts me that I could sit here and complain about the things I don't have, and never open my eyes to the world around me that's in need. Our group is in prayer about how we can help solve this need for them, including just donating the money ourselves so that these people can have a place to sit in worship. I would also like to encourage all of you out there who are reading this to think about what you could do to help the world in general, and this need specifically.

It's taken me so long to write this blog because I still am having a hard time about this situation. It's so inexcusable. It's horrible. It's a sinful world, and we ourselves are sinful, but Christ has called us to such a higher calling than this. This need is just an eye opening experience to soooooo many more examples of the needs in Christ's church throughout the world that have gone unmet and unnoticed. I'm not sure I can sit in on a building/reconstruction committee at a church ever again the same way. If a church in the slums of Kenya can meet and reach people with the gospel for 20 years in an 8x10 room without electricity, water, sound, or powerpoint- it makes you wonder...

After this we went to a nearby park for lunch where we took a nature hike to a waterfall, and under the waterfall some caves. The park was aptly called Paradise Lost. Very beautiful- there was a lake and everything. :) I even rode a camel in honor of my dear friend Elinor. :) It was a great place to be by myself and help process the morning with God.

This morning we went to Pastor Carlos' church in downtown Nairobi where we got to sing and act within a service, and here a traditional Swahili choir! I even stayed after the English service to participate in the Swahili service. It was awesome to see their faith through actions and song. I've never been in a louder service I think. It was very impactful!

We went to the shoppers market today and we were all bombarded by a million sellers asking us to look and buy!!! I almost got swallowed up in the wave of confusion, but I managed to start getting the hang of saying no. I feel like my skin got a little bit tougher today for standing up for myself over other people's feelings...maybe :)

Last night on my way back to my room I ran into a wild bunch of Norwegian bankers on holiday. I was carrying my guitar (actually my Uncle's guitar, thanks Uncle :) ) back to my room and they asked me to start playing for them with some of the other kids I was with as well. I proceeded to play and sing and hang out with them for the next 2 hours as we played everything from Bread to Michael Jackson. It was an amazing night in the fact that they also asked me to play some of my Christian tunes and we actually closed the night off with singing Amazing Grace together, the Benediction, and then How Great Is Our God. I would have never guessed it. They were very interested in the Christian music, and this 'American friend' as they termed it, was very very good. Of course they were drunk, and loved singing 'nah nah nah nah nah' instead of words when we couldn't remember very popular tunes' lyrics. :) It reminded me of home...minus 10 Norwegian guys and add either family or friends... :)

We set off for Kilimanjaro today. I can't freaking wait. I hope I make it to the top. If I do, you won't be hearing from me until after next Saturday...if I don't, you might be hearing from me much sooner than this. :) Here's hoping!

Alright, so in perfect Matt fashion, it's late, and I decided to blog to all of you instead of pack my bags for tomorrow!

Pray for our safety, and pray for God's church. That He would begin to stir a new movement of awareness to all of us within the church, of the needs that simply need us to fill them.

Titus 3

Doing What is Good

¹Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, ²to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men.

³At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. ⁴But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, ⁵he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, ⁶whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, ⁷so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. ⁸This is a trustworthy saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable for everyone.

Peaches

They Were Standing In The Fire, Yet They Were Not Consumed...

2009-06-04T17:56:00.000-07:00

Today we spent the day in the slums of Kenya. We took a tour of a church which was involved in the political riots a couple years ago. The church was supported by the LCMS world mission fund and had just finished building a brand new doctors facility to treat the people in the slums, and a sanctuary with a school. When the riots started happening, people hopped the iron fence and started looting and setting things on fire. It was horrible to see such devastation still two years removed from the conflict that took place. He told us stories of the people that looted--the man who stole the pastoral albs and chalice and started serving to the people was found dead the very next day. The church caught on fire that day but stopped right at the altar for no reason at all. The church is made of brick and dry wood- excellent for burning. Yet it stopped all on its own. The churches Bible was caught on fire- and the only thing left to read was Psalm 124:

If the LORD had not been on our side—
let Israel say- if the LORD had not been on our side
when men attacked us, when their anger flared against us,
they would have swallowed us alive; the flood would have engulfed us,
the torrent would have swept over us, the raging waters
would have swept us away. Praise be to the LORD,
who has not let us be torn by their teeth. We have escaped like a bird
out of the fowler's snare;
the snare has been broken,
and we have escaped. Our help is in the name of the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

What an amazing testament to power of God and His workings in His people on earth. The slum where this church comes from is actually where President Obama's family comes from as well. During his travels around the world this past year he came and visited this place to talk with the people, to give them hope.

A thought I couldn't get out of my head as we walked around the building grounds of the church today was why hasn't anybody stepped up to help them anymore after the huge riot? Here this church is running a full elementary school and community development program from a burnt up church, a burnt up basement, and a couple other class rooms. We were met today by about 50-60 children eager to sing and dance and praise the Lord with us for a special assembly. They were all so cute! :) They would come up and hold our hands and jump on us without asking. How I wish we could show more unabandoned joy.

The people of Kenya, and from what I hear all of Africa, are a very proud country. They live in square dirt rooms with sanitation problems all around, yet you would not know it by the way they dress or act toward you. I have yet to meet someone who has not smiled at me and exclaimed Jambo! (hi in swahili) or welcomed us to their country. Matt Thompson and I met a man on our plane out here who had just gotten back from running the San Diego Rock n Roll Marathon like last week. He took first place with a marathon time of 2 hours and 13 minutes. That's a little over 5 minutes each mile. Holy crap. He talked with us for about 5 minutes than invited Matt and I along with our whole group over to his house this Sunday for a traditional African dinner. I wonder if I would ever have dreamt of doing such a thing if I ran into people on a plane. Would I have shown such amazing hospitality to strangers in a foreign land?

The second slum we went to I ran into a ministry in which I have some loose ties too due to my recent interviews with a church called Salem Lutheran in Tomball, TX! They are helping to give eye glass and dentist work to people in the slums at churches where the people of that congregation can then preach the gospel to all the people that come! I was amazed at how small the world is to run into my dear friends at Salem in Tomball's ministry! They are also staying at the place we sleep at as well! Crazy! There is also another church which is partnering with them from Austin, TX- Redeemer Lutheran.

We sang a lot today for many different people! They also sang for us! It was great!

Tomorrow we will be busy putting up a roof at either a school or a church nearby the area we were in today! I am very excited!

It's funny to see animals running around wild- baboons, exotic birds, etc.

The thought that this trip is not just a tiny trip set in today for me especially. Certain things have come up for me when thinking about the states and all my friends and family back home. I am not here on a short visit. I am here for a very long time. Pray that I will continue to find strength and the energy needed each day to give as much of myself as possible to everyone we meet and on our very own team.

Alright, it's almost sunrise out on the Kenyan plains, and I still need a little rest for the upcoming day! Thanks for everyone who has been posting and viewing my blog! You have encouraged me as well!

Peaches.

3 Out Of 5 Ain't That Bad...

2009-06-03T07:09:00.000-07:00

Monday was our big day in the city. It was really freaking awesome, and I wish I had all the time in the world just to talk about that- but unfortunately I have to blog about three days, so it will be short! We saw Big Ben, The London Eye, The Tower Bridge, The London Tower, The Globe, and Westminster Abbey!!!!

Andrew and I were the only ones brave enough to take the tour (it was 15 pounds...) but it was well worth it. The chapel is absolutely breath-taking and soaked rich of history! We saw the grave of King Henry V, Handel, Darwin, Newton, Ralph Van Williams, and even Jesus! (not really the Jesus part...)

But to be standing in a chapel that has seen the coronation of so many dynasties and funerals (Princess Di) was something you cannot understand until standing there. Quite humbling.

We saw the play As You Like It, written by Shakespeare in The Globe Theater-- which is a replica of the original stage it would have been performed while the writer was still alive. We got to stand in the groundlings section right in front of the stage for the whole play! Tiring, but amazing. :)

We set sail for Kenya yesterday and arrived late at night. We are now staying with a local missions group and our guide leader is actually a Pastor who I met 6 years ago when I traveled to Brazil with the Concordia Choir my freshman year! It was freakin nuts to see him.

The compound we are staying at is best described as something out of Jurassic Park (sweet guards included) and really beautiful.

Today we went to an elephant orphanage where we met about 18 baby elephants who had been orphaned out in the wild. We also met a teenie tiny rhino baby! He was the size of normal dog, and loved to charge. :)

After that we went to a giraffe petting zoo and I french kissed my new friend. I didn't even have to buy her dinner. :)

This morning we talked as a group about temptation from Luke chapter 4. We brought up the question as to why we might not look for the way out of our temptations when God has promised in His word that He will provide a door out of our temptations (1 Corinthians 10:13). I have been thinking that it might be more than just that sin is fun and we like it. Maybe it's because it's easier. To look for a door takes pain and suffering sometimes. It takes discipline. Maybe we can't handle delaying our gratification in life. I think it's like that for me. I also believe that often times I really don't believe that God will provide for me. That God will come through. I don't believe that I am worthy of it. I don't love myself enough to do the things that would be better for me to do...and I don't think I'm alone. :)

Tomorrow we go to a Christian school where we will lead songs and talk with them about stuff...I'm not so sure yet on what...I only know that my part is playing kids songs with them. :)

I am off to go swim in a pool in Kenya.

Peaches.

Sunday Traditional Breakfast And Afternoon Tea

2009-05-31T17:47:00.000-07:00

So today was a beautiful Sunday in Londontown. (It's not really called Londontown- but I like the way it sounds in a British accent...) :)

The church we have been staying at asked us to be a part of their service this morning--so I set about the task of turning our 14 people into an awesome church choir! :) We did two songs in the beginning of the service (All Creatures and How Great Is Our God) and then a special offering song (From the Inside Out). I had a blast leading the choir on my guitar and seeing the potential we might have for next week when we will be singing for over 400 people in Kenya at church on Sunday.

The church follows the traditional Lutheran Divine Service 1 and they asked me to be the cantor for the morning. I must admit that that could have been one of the very first inspirations for me wanting to be a pastor--getting to sing all those sweet chants! The pastor's part is way more exciting than the congregations. :)

We painted the women's 'toilet' toay as well. So exciting...lol :)

Today was a very relaxed day. I napped, we walked down to the towns local pub and ate dinner- all in all it was a great day for spiritual resting! Our teams afternoon devotion time flowed into the entire night and it has inspired a lot of us to think about life...

Tomorrow we go into Londontown and see the sights! Some of us might try to spend the entire night out there at the pubs and such so that we can sleep on our ten hour plane ride to Kenya on Tuesday.

Continue to pray for all of us, and that unity would continue to be our goal throughout this process. And that love would be our ultimate driving force.

We are keeping a video blog on a differrent website if you are interested in following that as well here is the link:

http://www.causecast.org/member/sambretzmann

Peaches.

Day 1&2- London

2009-05-30T12:41:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my blog! You'll have to deal with the lack of customizing on this page, as I doubt I will have that much time to make it look cool...what with stealing internet from random free places and houses in the city and such. :)

The reason for this blog is to talk about my travels this summer and hopefully for the rest of my life! Currently I am on a mission trip with 13 other students and one professor from Concordia University in Irvine, California. Our plan is to go to Kenya, Tanzania, Uganda, and Rwanda to help the people there. To show Christ. To be Christ. And to get a greater worldview of Christs mission for the church.

There are so many of you who want to know what I'm up too and how all of us on the team are doing, so I decided I would keep a blog for you and for myself as well. I haven't decided exactly what kind of blog this will be-- informational, ranting, depressing, happy...etc.-- but I'm sure we will figure it out together!

Yesterday we arrived in London where we will be staying until Tuesday morning! It's crazy to think that I am in a city that literally has a history of well over 2000 years! We went to a local pub last night and mingled with the locals. Andrew and I tried to figure out how to get to a pub in London to watch the Lakers game at 2am London time with Matt and Chris by our side, but it was to no avail- so instead we walked on the train tracks for a bit. :)

This morning the group went to Oxford to go see the place where C.S. Lewis and Tolkien would have met and sat around talking about life and books. :) Although that would have been cool to see-- Andrew and I decided to go off to London by ourselves to get a small taste of the city before we all go together on Monday. We rode the train in from Petts Wood (the city of the church we are staying) and traveled all day. We saw the art gallery and actually stumbled upon a Christian rap concert in the park. "When I say Jesus, you say Christ." ...yup, that's right. :)

Andrew and I decided to go see The Lion King at the Lyceum Theatre this afternoon. It was pretty sweet! London musicals out here are on the same caliber as Broadway in the states, but it was funny to hear everyone speaking in their normal British accent...we had a wonderful time!

It's been amazing to see the people of London interact with one another. There are some folks that are really happy to talk to us and help us figure directions and places to go--but there are many others who seem to either hate the fact that I exist, or hate their own lives. :)

I have never understood why people would waste their life living in such a terrible state. Why must the world always be seen from a "half empty" point of view? Jesus Christ has given us the only reason to celebrate and live truly full of joy. Now joy isn't always being happy, but there is a confidence that we can have in putting our joy in Christ and His salvation for the whole world--including us.

I am stoked to be going into this trip with a group of friends who are not very close to me. It will give me practice at loving people. I am also excited to be free. Free to do whatever Jesus would tell me to do. Free to be disciplined by His love. Free to free others. Free.

I am hoping to lose a lot of my freedoms that I have attained as a priviledged American in order to gain Christ's true freedom. I see often the chains of this world on my life and on my time--things that I have allowed to enslave me in the disguise of fast, easy, and more accessible. Perhaps I will encourage others to do the same.

Anyway, this is day one and two!!! :)

Peaches.